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PRIDE AND PREJUDICE







A Study in Thought






sa022



by





Marius Heuff

Chapter 1

Content

The three forms of pride; roots, personal achievements and judgements.
Mechanisms of prejudice.
Relationships between pride and prejudice, and the social acceptability of a judgement.

1 How ambiguous is our evaluation of pride! It is usually considered to be a highly esteemed and indispensible characteristic for the well-integrated members of society, because it is a necessary stimulus to achievement and fortitude, but, it may also become a source of endless friction, strife and misery. What is pride, and, how does prejudice relate to pride?

2 Pride is a form of self-esteem; a sense of value of our "self", and, we can argue, convincingly, that, without a sense of value for one's own existence, or "ego", no human being could function normally. A man without some form of pride in the value of his own being, becomes an unpredictable opportunist, who is quickly scorned by all who come into contact with him, and, his behaviour is similar to that of a psychopath who has no conscience.

3 Of course, we are not saying, that the definition of a psychopathic personality is, simply, a lack of the development of self-esteem, but, we will see, that the function of conscience, the ability to distinguish between right and wrong, as well as the ability to be concerned with the well-being of someone else, is only possible, if we value our life and our well-being, and, if we are, in essence, happy to be alive and to be the person we have become.

4 Let us accept, for the time being, that pride is, indeed, a value-judgement adhered to by the members of a social environment, in spite of the fact, that the intellectual justification or conceptual precision of this judgement or value-system is often vague or absent. In our pride, we believe, very strongly, in a certain set of guidelines, a certain code of behaviour, or, a certain set of values, without knowing, precisely, why we value these guidelines so highly, or, why we become angry and defensive, if these guidelines and values are questioned or challenged.

5 What are we proud of? There are three broad categories where we draw our sense of pride from. The most fundamental motivation to be proud, is a fondness or a love for the culture and society we come from. This is only possible, if we have been able to identify, closely, with the cultural environment into which we were born and grew-up. We will then always feel an affection for this particular culture and social environment. We have the feeling that we belong to a specific cultural environment, because we realise, that we have been nourished by its contents, and, we experience a feeling of being rooted in this particular culture. If we are isolated from our roots, we may become nostalgic and insecure, and, we tend to emphasise our origins with an emotion of pride and firmness.

6 This type of pride; the sense of belonging, or the awareness of our roots, is interwoven with the sense of achievement, which we may or may not experience, whenever we review our life and look back upon our ambitions and dreams. We all vary in the way we judge to have been successful, and, we have analysed, before, the complexity and contradictoriness of our goal-patterns. Let us say, here, only, that we all have ambiguous feelings and attitudes towards the accomplishments of our lives, and, virtually no-one will think of him- or herself as a total failure, or, as a complete success.

7 We all have some sense of achievement, even, if we have revised, frequently, our goals and wind-up, eventually, taking stock of what we have achieved without feeling particularly good or successful about it. Yet, we can say, that we became, eventually, somebody. We developed a few potentials, and, we explored a few possibilities, but, the potentials we did not or could not develop, have now slipped out of reach. We are what we will be for the rest of our lives, and, even rather dramatic changes in our ways of living will not significantly alter our personality, ideas, skills or attitudes. We have become, and, we are full-grown.

8 Then, there is this third category upon which we base a sense of self-esteem, but, it may well be, that we have to consider this area as a subconscious form of compensation or adaptation in our behaviour-patterns, whenever we realise, mostly intuitively, that a foundation of pride in our origins and achievements leaves us with a rather meagre harvest, indeed. I am thinking, here, about our judgement systems; the way we judge society and others around us, or, groups of people we do not consider to be part of our social environment. These judgements and attitudes are, primarily, subconscious. They are designed to boost our self-esteem, and, because they are unable to stand-up to close and honest scrutiny, they become quickly rigid and unquestioned opinions.

9 If these attitudes are clearly elitist and discriminatory in nature, we are dealing with outright prejudice, but, we have to realise, that this is, invariably, an outsider's judgement. We tend to form, quickly, broad criticisms about groups of people we know little about, and, we come easily, and without much thought, to the conclusion, that these people are inferior to us, and, that they are a source of chaos and trouble. A scapegoat is such a common crutch for our self-esteem, because we avoid, then, the need to accept responsibility ourselves for the problems we are experiencing.

10 Here, we see, clearly, the major role for an attitude of prejudice. A prejudice is an attitude of being superior, where we judge and condemn specific people or groups of people, and, in doing we, we do not have to look any further for the causes of the trouble we, and our society, are in. When we examine prejudicial opinions more closely, we see, that we often judge harshly those trends in others, which we find difficult to master or conquer within ourselves. By projecting our harsh condemnation upon others, (who are failing in a way which we recognise, subconsciously, as "familiar"), we help to suppres our own tendency to give-in to the same temptations. A harsh judgement helps us to control ourselves, and, we try to stay within the confines of the social and moral guidelines of our conscience by harshly condemning any infringements upon these boundaries by others.

11 Is this still pride, or, are we talking about a different concept? True, we are describing, here, a mechanism that plays an important role in shaping our attitudes of self-esteem, and, we are describing emotional judgements which we may recognise, more clearly, as prejudices in others, whenever we acknowledge such judgements to be less than desirable. When we sense strong emotional overtones and existential anxieties playing a role in the formation of these divisive judgements, we are able to see them as a prejudice, but, if such judgements are not clearly condemned by a variety of social and cultural guidelines, then, we have no criteria with which to make a judgement of prejudice, and, we may call these attitudes, "patriotic".

12 In other words, attitudes of prejudice are possible towards groups or individuals within our social horizons, because, at least, part of our cultural heritage condemns these judgements and attitudes, and labels them as a prejudice, but, we are not able to label a collective hostility of our own social environment towards another social grouping or nation as a prejudice, unless we have been fortunate enough to absorb a broad cultural spectrum that lets us see the narrow sphere of concern of our own particular cultural locale.

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Chapter 2

Content

An analysis of the attitudes of pride and prejudice.
Pride and sacred belief structures.
Reasons for the vagueness of many ideas and concepts.
The need for intellectual precision.
Pride, prejudice and social mechanisms in the establishment of the hierarchical structure.
Differences between success and achievement.
The role of confidence.
The pride of roots and origins; relationships with strangers.
The weapon of pride and the search for triumph.
Quiet confidence and personal achievement; trust.

1 What happens, when our behaviour is coloured by an attitude of pride, and, in examining this question, we will see, that the attitude of pride is, partly, a defensive attitude against doubts about our own abilities, but, the strengthening of our confidence with the attitude of pride introduces, at the same time, the vulnerability that comes with an attitude of rigidity. We have seen before, that every weapon or tool has its price, and, the price of rigidity is shared by two defensive attitudes that appear to have little in common; pride and a reverent humility.

2 In pride, as well as the attitude of reverent awe, certain ideas and concepts are considered to be highly valuable; so valuable, in fact, that they are not questioned. This lack of questioning leaves these concepts intellectually vague and elusive. Yet, this is not surprising, because we have seen, that, any concept or attitude that is unquestionably and unconditionally shared by the members of a society, does not require a great deal of precision, nor does it require a process of intellectual refinement. The reason is, of course, that the absence of dissenting opinions and interpretations of a certain attitude or notion, makes the process of intellectual delineation irrelevant, and, any questioning or scrutiny is then felt as an insult or a sign of disloyalty.

3 In pride, we see a variety of attitudes, beliefs and opinions guiding our behaviour. We have accepted these guidelines largely subconsciously, and, we adhere to them without questions or hesitation. We can usually not define the reasons, why we are proud of our origins, because the reasons are unimportant, as long as the feeling or attitude of pride gives us comfort and security. We feel attched to our roots, but, it is an emotional response, and, we have no desire to substantiate our pride with an intellectual excercise in supporting arguments, because we realise, intuitively, that such a process may hurt us by making us aware of discrepancies and inconsistencies, which would undermine our sense of security and certainty.

4 The contents and reasons for our pride remain, therefore, vague, as well as nearly completely subconscious, and, this pride is best able to guide us through a maze of behavioural choices as long as it stays in the subconscious mind. This is what we want. We want our pride to be helpful to us, especially, when we have to answer challenges to our existence, and, the last thing we want, is to weaken our pride with a long intellectual analysis. The pride of our origins and the prejudices of our cultural code work, therefore, closely together to help us establish a comfortable niche for ourselves, and, by relying heavily upon these two aspects of pride, we are less vulnerable to the embarrassing awareness of a rather modest content of personal achievements.

5 All these aspects play a role in determining our attitudes, and, they determine also, to a large extent, our place in the social hierarchy. Pride is a defensive, as well as an offensive weapon in the struggle for a position in the social hierarchy, and, in particular, the weapons of prejudice and silent condemnation become a powerful source of contempt and hatred. Certainly, our position will have to be acknowledged, to a certain extent, by others in our social surroundings, and, when we receive such an acceptance, we relax a little, and, we may even show a humble facade, because we have "arrived".

6 The evaluation of personal achievment is, therefore, a mixture of jockeying for a social position, (with the support and acknowledgement from the social environment), together with a personal evaluation of our own skills and insights. We can not rely entirely upon the acceptance given to us by others, because we become then enslaved to a chronic insecurity in our dealings with other people, but, neither can we disregard, totally, how other people think about our achievements and aims.

7 We see, always, a mixture of skill and recognition, personal drive and acceptance; an instinctive aggressiveness to dominate in the areas where we are confident, as well as a recognition of the need to be relevant for other people. In the concept of "success", we emphasise the judgement of the social environment, while the word "achievement" focusses upon the merits and accomplishments as seen by ourselves. Yet, both concepts are interrelated, because neither can exist entirely independently from the other.

8 For most people, this differentiation between success and achievement will be superfluous, because they can not, nor do they want to, distinguish between a sense of personal achievement and the recognition of their efforts by others. As we mentioned, we can not separate entirely the idea of achievement from an evaluation by the social environment, because a totally individualistic evaluation of an achievement becomes meaningless, because it may become an autistic and irrelevant expression. On the other hand, we may want to emphasise, that there could be a wide gulf between a superficial contemporary public opinion and the later evaluation of a thoughtful audience or a small group.

9 There is a marked difference between a modish, superficial public taste, which has been manipulated by clever merchandising techniques, and, the careful and unhurried evaluation of a thoughtful and reflective human being, who has been seriously searching for satisfying answers when he perceived that his surroundings were inadequate to provide the information and concepts he was looking for. This discrepancy fuels the efforts of renewal and re-evaluation, which become the objectives of many people who have to endure the stress of chronic dissatisfaction.

10 As we mature, our sense of achievement may change dramatically, and, we may even state, that we can not fully grow-up and mature, unless we are willing to shift, from time to time, our ideas and objectives. Before we can divorce ourselves from current fads and opinions about success and achievement, we must develop a quiet pride and confidence in ourselves, which lets us study and contemplate the meaning of our social surroundings as well as our own existence.

11 Confidence in ourselves, therefore, is a factor that enters into our evaluation of pride. However, a rigidly defined attitude of pride seems to be a defensive substitute for a lack of quiet self-confidence, where we can be flexible and unobtrusive, because we do not need to proclaim loudly our virtues and values. A quiet self-confidence is in a much better position to take distance from a specific cultural locale, and, the gain in intellectual precision, as well as the awareness of previously unnoticed discrepancies, are remarkable indeed. Individualised skills and personal differentiations become a viable and flexible element of our existence, as we quietly explore avenues of endeavour which are often foreign to a particular cultural locale. Yet, self-esteem, confidence, pride and a genuine search for meaning remain tied-together in the process of actualisation or becoming.

12 Pride may also be a fearful and powerful weapon of self-defense, capable of overkill. Our pride may become such an obsession, that we refuse help when we need it. From an outsider's point of view, such an attitude is clearly self-defeating, but the sense of victory or the resistance to defeat may be carried to such an extreme, that, for the sake of the heady emotion of a proud triumph, much needed help will be refused in a defiant posture of equality or superiority. Pride may, then, become the back-bone for an attitude of tenacious resistance, but the strong sense of pride imparts a rigidity that is detrimental to the adaptative capabilities of such an individual. We see, here, an exact parallel with the rigidity imparted to beliefs that are held sacred, and, we are describing essentially similar phenomena.

13 Pride in our roots of origin is, not surprisingly, strongly developed in those people who need a strong support from their social environment in order to feel secure. People, who rely heavily upon the feeling of acceptance by their environment, will consider the integrity and continuity of their cultural and social fabric as extremely important. Yet, as a rule, the sense of pride for people who live in their place of social and cultural origin, remains subdued, but, as soon as these people become separated from their culture, the sense of pride and nostalgia become a source of strength, as well as artistic inspiration. While people live and work within the society of their birth, their common origins and cultural bonds remain submersed in the subconscious mind, because people are absorbed, as everywhere else, by their efforts to find a place in society.

14 Let us look at the opposite mechanisms, where we see a stranger or a group of strangers enter our society and they start competing for a place within our social environment. The common bond of the cultural heritage of the "natives" is rapidly transformed into a common attitude of mild suspicion and silent condescension. We become somewhat suspicious and defensive, because we do not know the qualities and capabilities of these strangers, and, they may pose a threat to the skills and ambitions of the local population. Yet, most of the time, we are assured by our position of belonging to a majority, as well as the obvious effort of the strangers to adopt our way of life. We become tolerant, even mildly impressed by the efforts of these strangers, as they seek to fit into "our society". How easy is it to slip into an attitude of superficial elitism towards these strangers, and, we have then completed the circle towards discrimination and prejudice.

15 Will the attitude of quiet confidence prevent us from forming prejudicial judgements? In our attitudes of quiet self-confidence, we see, frequently, an attitude of trust in the fellow human being. This attitude of trust is, in essence, a part of this sense of quiet confidence, and, it is partly related to the fortunate circumstances we were exposed to as a child. An atmosphere of mutual trust and security gave us the confidence to be trustful towards other people, even, if we learned to be cautious and discriminating as a result of painful experiences. Yet, we also know, that a natural trust, which developed as a result of fortunate childhood experiences, is not sufficient to explain all trustful behaviour, and, we have discussed this remarkable, deliberate act of trust carried-out by the mature adult as a result of his religious convictions or personal philosophy.

16 Both factors play a role, and, we see, that the people, who are most likely to become successful achievers and valuable leaders of their community, have indeed experienced a fortunate mix of security and stimulation. They have experienced enough security to retain their curiosity to learn about other people and retain a willingness to expose themselves to unfamiliar surroundings, but, they have also received a sufficient level of stimuluation to learn, from an early age, the fine line between a charming trustfulness and a vulnerable naivity.

17 Such fortunate and gifted people will feel less strongly the need to rely upon the shelter of social acceptance or personal achievement. They do not need a comforting elitism to protect their self-esteem from vicious assaults, but, we should not forget, that the image of the truly altruistic personality is more the result of an imaginative reflection about human potentials and expectations, than the description of an actual reality in the world of living human beings and their social environment.

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Chapter 3

Content

Pride and dignity.
Meaning of life; mental depression.
The dualism of good and evil; the role of leadership.
Religious concepts about an existence after dealth.
Western assumptions about its role as guardians of the Christian Faith.
The Western philosophy of competitiveness and free-enterprise.
Our knowledge of the Will of God.

1 Are the feelings of dignity, self-esteem and pride, in essence, similiar in concept and attitude? We have seen, how contradictory the attitudes of pride can be, and, we have reviewed some of the beneficial and harmful features of pride. Pride may be a form of cultural or collective consciousness, and, it is then a necessary element in the self-esteem of an individual or an entire community, but, we have also discussed the rigidity and stubbornness, as well as the unnecessary suffering and hardship attitudes of pride may bring-about.

2 Yet, without pride and dignity, where do we stand? A wounded pride and a trampled dignity are, often, more painful than physical wounds, and, they still provide a major impetus for many bloody conflicts of revenge. We are obviously dealing, here, with strong and primitive emotions. Does our sense of pride prevent or help us to give dignity to another human being? Can we only value other life, if we value our own, and, in what way do we have to value ourselves, before we can value the existence of others?

3 If life becomes meaningless for us; if we have lost all sense of value of being alive, the struggle for existence, even, the smaller efforts, will then seem senseless to us, and a lack of the will to survive may endanger many others. A profound feeling of depression reflects a period with many unanswered questions. Why should we struggle; why should we continue to face the contradictions, the non-understanding of it all? Why continue to live? Would it not be better to dissolve completely into a non-existence, finally at peace?

4 We tend to forget, that we will not be able to appreciate "being at peace", if we are non-existent, and, if something of us survives, how can we be sure that this something will be "at rest"? Our religious heritage says very clearly, that such an existence in peace is not possible after death, unless we die in peace and harmony with our conscience, accepted by our God.

5 The doubts of a severe mental depression affect all our experiences, including our religious beliefs, and, the feelings of depression may be so strong, that we are totally oblivious of our religious beliefs, when we take our life in a fit of deep despair. Even, if we never cross this crucial threshold of actually committing suicide, many doubts will be with us throughout our existence, and, we will wonder to what extent we may trust our belief in God, or, the codes of behaviour which our religious and secular leaders are so anxious to impose upon us.

6 We wonder, whether or not we are being deceived, and, we suspect that our obedience and sacrifices to the tenets of our Faith, or the needs of the nation, are being exploited by our leaders and others in a position of power. Are we merely a dumb pawn, a work-horse for the clever and the rich? Is all this talk about good and evil, or patriotism and sacrifice for the good of the nation, merely a sinister plot to exploit our efforts and psychological resources?

7 Are all these promises about a life after death, eternal happiness and justice, not merely a facile promise to keep us subdued and pliable while in bondage to our exploiting over-lords? We have seen, too often, how the promises of our leaders have been broken, and, how their own actions belie their teachings. It is time to rethink, from the ground up, the role of our leaders, and, in particular, we should scrutinise, very carefully, how they came to be in a position of leadership.

8 It is probably one of the great ironies of the Western societies to consider themselves as the guardians of the Christian Faith and the champion of Christian ethics, while, at the same time, Western leaders have a tendency to propagate the ideas of personal success, of competitive struggle, and the glory of free-enterprise. It is not surprising, that Western ideology and the Christian faith present a confusing picture, and, that the outsider becomes suspicious, if he is asked, or forced, to swallow these inconsistencies. How can one proclaim in all sincerity, the virtues of brotherly love and Christian humility, while exhibiting, at the same time, a most blatant mixture of egocentric attitudes and gluttonous, opportunistic behaviour? And, we still wonder, why we are not believed by our bretheren in the under-developed world!

9 How would it look to us, if we see someone teaching, in all sincerity, the virtues of poverty, humility and tolerance, or, even, a love for our enemies, while he uses his powers to exploit? How would we react, if we see these preachers accumulate wealth and property, while preaching sanctimoniously about the God-willed divisions of the rich and the poor? We, in the West, have appropriated as one of our cherished possessions, the exclusive guardianship of a remarkable Faith, Christianity, and, we fight, with vigour, anyone, who dares to challenge us as the official guardians of the Word of God.

10 We defend brotherly love with vigour and violence. Failure and poverty are God's punishment for a lack of Faith in adhering to a militant social code, and, we have become, beyond the shadow of a doubt, God's chosen people, who know how to interpret the Word and the Will of God.

11 We are proud of our righteousness, and, we have chained Christ to our side. We know, that God has given us this good feeling of winning the struggle for survival as a God-given reward to industrious and acquisitive people, and, we have the right to be exclusive and scornful of those, who have not recognised our right to interpret the Word of God. We quarrel and fight for the honour of our Lord, while we occupy, without any questions, the most privileged positions, because we know, that it is God's Will to be where we are. Would God not have arranged it differently, if our position in the world would not conform to the Will of God?

12 What happened to love and charity? Yes, we have not forgotten them. We contribute every week to the Church, and, we are helping the poor. Those poor, mind you, deserve to be poor, because we can not really help those upon whom God's displeasure has fallen, and, we know, do we ever know, whom God loves and whom He despises! We know God's Will so well, that we confidently proclaim whom God has destined to be saved or whom he has damned, forever, even, if the Lord still has to pronounce Judgement.

13 What about the attitude of humility, and the confession of our sins? Sure, we know we are sinful, but we have made a great deal of progress. We do not ruffle the feelings of our neighbours or the members of the congregation. We are disciplined in our behaviour and our thoughts, and we do not take deliberately advantage of anyone, who belongs to God's chosen people. However, the other people, the outsiders and heathens, we certainly do take advantage of, because they do not deserve to be treated like equal human beings. After all, they do not belong to the children of God. By taking advantage of them, we praise the Lord, because we add to the wealth and glory of the children of God, and, we may help those wretched sinners realise that they are losing-out to God's chosen people.

14 Perhaps, they will see the light and join us. Of course, we would have to deliberate very carefully, whether or not it is in God's interest to have these strangers join us, but, the ways of the Lord are wonderful. Perhaps, He meant to save some of these wretched creatures after all, but, they have to show proper humility for the Lord, and, they will have to beg before they are allowed to join the children of God.

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Chapter 4

Content

Difficulties with Christian ethics.
The inversion of the biological heritage.
Pride in suffering for Christ.
The apparent inversion of the attitude of pride.
The value of atonement.

1 The problem with Christian ethics lies in the fact, that it advocates a complete break with the most fundamental aspects of our biological heritage. It advocates non-aggression, non-violence, non-resistance to attack, representing a total inversion of the value of existence; from a biological self-defense in the search for viability, to an ultimate value in eternal life, by sacrificing the self for the sake of others.

2 Christian beliefs and attitudes, when taken to their extreme, logical conclusions, invert, therefore, completely the value of the self, including the value of human existence. This inversion resulted from an intuitive recognition of the fact, that the biological drive to self-preservation and an exploratory expansion into all possibilities of existence, leads always to strife, conflict, death and misery. Perhaps, a radical inversion of the drive to self-preservation could overcome the riddle of suffering and death. If the drive to adhere to life always leads to conflict and misery, then, the drive to sacrifice one's life should lead to never-ending love, peace and happiness. It seemed a remarkable persuasive attitude at the time the Christian belief structures were coming into being, because meaning was given to suffering in a way it had never been given before.

3 Suffering becomes, then, a means of increasing one's self-esteem; not openly, in a boasting manner, but hidden, quietly, in an act of atonement and reconciliation with the Creator. Only suffering, born for the good of mankind, and endured for the sake of non-violence, will increase the value of individual existence in the Judgement of God and His Suffering Son. How remarkably persuasive is it, to take the figure of a crucified rebel and transform it into a symbol of mankind, which can now be redeemed from its curse of Original Sin , and find access to an enduring and eternal harmony of divine existence.

4 We have discussed, before, why such an attitude or belief is, in essence, unassailable, because every effort and hardship to effect a change in attitude, will only serve as a fuel to kindle the importance and meaning of sacrificial attitudes and beliefs. Such a belief and atitude can only be conquered, (very successfully, as a matter of fact), by comfort, wealth and freedom from all stress. In a stress-free situation, the symbol of the suffering Christ starts to lose its relevance, and, we know, how quickly the relevance of a suffering Christ can fade.

5 Do we, indeed, see in the Christian attitude of humility, an inversion of the attitude of pride as well? Not at all. The values have only changed polarity. If we humble our ego before someone else, we add to the value of the self in the light of our beliefs, and, we re-enforce our beliefs, until our Faith is so strong, that, only severe suffering, or, even, death may be sufficient to bring-about a full identification or union with Christ.

6 Is this pride. Yes, it is a form of pride. However, it may not be a superficial pride to gain esteem in the eyes of our fellow believers. The costs are too high for that, and, it is usually a genuine, be it compulsive attitude, which makes us believe, that this is the only way to gain self-esteem in the light of our Faith.

7 The feverish demands of such a strenuous code of behaviour make it imperative to have some kind of mechanism whereby we can admit to ourselves, as well as to the community at large, that we have failed to some extent; that we have made mistakes, and, that we have been weak because of fear or temptation. Our self-respect, which has been wounded by attitudes and actions we condemn in ourselves as a weakness, a temptation, and a betrayal of our Faith and our God, needs to be restored. If we can not find a genuinely satisfying way to restore our self-respect, we become utterly depressed and helpless.

8 Without an effective way to purge a soul, or a guilty conscience, the tensions become unbearable. The sense of self-esteem disappears completely, and the individual falls, then, into a dangerous state of depression, which may lead to crime or suicide. The tendency to self-destruction may easily lead to homicide and other acts of reckless disregard for human life.

9 We have to be able to feel the cleansing emotional surge of acknowledgeing and repenting our mis-deeds, in one way or another, and such a mechanism does not have to be confined to religious creeds. Everyone of us has to choose, at times, between our own interests and the interests of others, and, everyone will make a choice, now and then, which we regret, in retrospect. Then, we need a mechanism whereby we can make a fresh start and become, once again, an accepted member of our environment. The confession and repentance of wrong-doings is the only way to restore, effectively, a sense of pride in ourselves, and, all other mechanisms, regardless, how tempting it is to cover-up the promptings of our conscience, lead only to deeper trouble.

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Chapter 5

Content

The destructiveness of the loss of self-esteem.
The problem of silent contempt.
Another look at the religious community.
The two forms of Christianity.
Reviewing the meaning of self-esteem.
Shifting goal-patterns and the meaning of life.
Limitations of egocentric attitudes.
The teaching of wisdom.
The act of atonement.
The basic requirements of wisdom.
The life-cycle of individuals and societies.

1 It seems reasonable to conclude, that we all need a sensitive, differentiated and somewhat independent sense of pride, in order to make attitudes of cooperation, understanding and mutual respect possible. A loss of self-esteem is destructive for ourselves and, frequently, for others as well.

2 It is true that an aggressor may sense our pride and self-confidence as a form of contempt, in spite of the fact, that we try to be understanding and cooperative. This quiet self-confidence and composure may provoke further anger and hatred, because the aggressor may feel threatened by a superior pride and self-esteem. It is not difficult to see, that a sense of self-confidence may easily slide into an attitude of superiority or silent contempt, but, if we give-in to such temptations, even, if it is done subconsciously, we have to acknowledge, that we failed in our efforts to be humble and compassionate.

3 How can we be compassionate and understanding, if we feel a secret contempt for someone? Yes, we can not deny, that it may be impossible to overcome such an emotion of contempt, regardless, how hard we try. We can not give dignity to our assailant, if we feel contempt for him. We can only lose our feelings of contempt, if we recognise the behavioural mechanisms of our asssailant as drives or impulses, which we have experienced ourselves. Only, when we realise, how much we have in common with our assailant, will we be able to understand, with charity in our hearts, rather than with contempt in our attitudes. However, if we are still too close to the difficulties we experienced when mastering trends we have condemned in ourselves; if we still remember, how much effort it took to overcome these temptations, we are emotionally aroused, and, in a subconscious state of defensiveness, we try to suppress, forcefully, the recognition or acknowledgement of these mechanisms.

4 By showing an attitude of aversion towards a recently suppressed trait, we try to keep this trend from re-asserting itself within us. Then, we have not been able, as yet, to see, how we all share in such or similar trends. We do not understand, as yet, who we are. Prejudice has a very similar basis, as we mentioned before. Here, too, we treat with contempt and, often, with an emotional vehemence that surprises us, certain characteristics of human behaviour and existence we have trouble controling ourselves.

5 We judge others harshly, and, we condemn prejudicial attitudes or practices harshly in others, without realising, that our judgements may have prejudicial overtones as well. We judge harshly, whenever we see, how the congregation of believers makes a mockery of the beliefs and guidelines they profess to adhere to. Perhaps, we should look at these people again. Perhaps, we may be able to see, how these believers have been steeped in a rigid moral code from early childhood; how they have been disciplined by their parents and their social surroundings, all their lives, and, how they still discipline themselves, now, as adults, while they are, in turn, disciplining their own children in the righteous ways of the Lord.

6 How often did they have to suppress one desire or another, which others could seemingly indulge in without ill effects? How often have they been abstemious when others indulged? Is it not reasonable to think that there may have been a twinge of envy, now and then, when the faithful compared their own austere attitudes and life-style with other people, who could do whatever they wanted, and, who would later repent their sins in loud wails and profuse tears? Can it be held against them, that they must have felt themselves a little better than those, who have come back to the fold after a life of undisciplined hedonism?

7 The righteous members of the congregation have made major investments in moral and disciplined behaviour all their lives, and, even, if they are not aware of it, such an emotional investment must make them feel more at home with those, who also worked hard to live by their Faith and conscience. Is it surprising, then, that they become clannish and clique together in an attitude of silent elitism and condemnation of those, who seek admission to the Lord at the last moment? Is it surprising to see, that the disciplined, God-fearing and austere community values more a life-long devotion to decency, discipline and righteousness, than an attitude of deep understanding and forgivenness towards the repenting sinner, who has tasted all those forbidden fruits and found them wanting?

8 It is not surprising, that there are two forms of Christianity; the orderly, somewhat narrow and righteous community, where the members live a disciplined life of suppressed drives and suspended emotions, and, on the other hand, the discovery and re-discovery of this momentous mystery of God's Grace and Love, when, suddenly, in an emotional surge, a somewhat reckless life-style is converted into a new sense of value. The Christianity of the repentent sinner is essentially different from the Christianity of the disciplined community; and, these opposites seldom meet.

9 If we come to the conclusion, that we have done reasonably well in living-up to our morals and ideals, whatever they may be, we can feel a certain satisfaction with ourselves, and, we assign ourselves a certain value. In our most expansive years, we keep shifting our goal-patterns further and further away, or, we change them into a different direction, because we feel a certain disappointment when we reach our objectives. "Is this now it", we ask ourselves intuitively. "Is this what we have worked for", and, we do not quite know, what to do next, because we are still searching to unfold the potentials of our particular existence.

10 If we keep shifting the goal-patterns in the same direction, we are striving for an ever greater degree of perfection in our accomplishments. This is the characteristic of the perfectionist, and, if we are successful, we become an expert in our field of endeavour. Most of us will shift our goal-patterns over a much wider range, and, this results in a broadening of our experiences and knowledge, but, at the same time, we run the risk of becoming somewhat haphazard and diffuse in the focus of our attention.

11 There is another, more important shift in goal-patterns, which many of us make somewhat later in life. We may realise, after the expansionism of our youth and adolescence, that all our goals were primarily egocentically oriented around the processes of becoming and exploring our potentials. However, after we have learned to accept the inevitability of declining powers and diminishing opportunities, we have to rethink the meaning of our existence. Then, we will look, again, with a fresh and mature insight upon the ethical and moral codes of our beliefs, and, we start to search for a meaning of life that goes byond the simple goals of achievement or the unfolding of personal abilities.

12 Now, we become sensitive, again, to the beauty of ethics, after we forgot, in a busy maturity, our youthful enthousiasm for justice during adolescence. In our simplistic enthousiasm, we hoped to reform the world. Now, after the peak of maturity has passed, we hope to reform ourselves, but, this task seems equally as difficult as the idealistic objectives of our youth. We try to reformulate the meaning of existence, and, we may come, rather suddenly, to the conclusion, that our goals of self-actualisation were vain objectives; that they were beside the point of ultimate meaning, and, we may, suddenly, lose our sense of self-esteem, as we realise, ever more clearly, how we have wasted our time on false idols, on egocentric, futile pursuits, and, how our achievements will die with us, totally meaningless for others.

13 We are starting to see, that our ultimate hope is to be remembered, in one way or another, by those, who will come after us, and, we begin to see, more clearly, that such an accomplishment does not depend at all on what we hoped to get out of life, but, what we gave to life; what we meant to others. Let us not forget, that we, the living generations only look to the past, or the present, with the blatantly egocentric question; "what does it all mean for us"? We revere art, knowledge, or, any other human expression, only, when it has relevance for us. Therefore, if we want to be remembered; if we want other people to know us and care about the fact that we existed, we have to make a genuine gift; we have to be willing to be or do something for someone else.

14 Let us not jump to the conclusion, that we all should try to become a major artist or scientist, whose name will be wispered in awe for generations to come. We have seen, how circumstances beyond the control of anyone particular individual play a role in the creation of a major artistic or scientific work, and, we know, now, that a remembered name depends, heavily, upon the lucky circumstances, as well as the hard work, which allowed someone to become a major contributor to future generations.

15 We all can make the contribution of a genuine and sincere effort to understand ourselves and the people around us, and, we all should realise that the attitudes of kindness and compassion are empty and phony, unless we are able to understand the nature of human existence. We all can, and should, make this effort to grasp the essence of our existence, because without a coherent idea about the meaning of our existence, we can
not hope to make a genuine contribution.

16 If we realise during our declining years, how blindly we have followed the egocentric promptings of our biological heritage, we are dismayed and depressed, at least, for a while, as we reflect upon the waste of time and the futility of our efforts. We feel to have been deceived by our passions, and, we have been blinded by our drives; we have only succeeded to carve, temporarily, a niche for ouselves in the social surroundings, and, we have the uneasy suspicion, that our strenuous efforts have only created a distance between us and others, as we realise that our environment is patiently waiting for our decline and demise; waiting to fill our place as soon as possible. Indeed, how soon will we be forgotten!

17 We wonder, how we will be remembered and judged, if we are remembered at all, and, we know, that we will be soon forgotten, regardless how hard we tried to be remembered, because our efforts and achievements have so little relevance for other people, except, perhaps, as a spur to emulate a similar effort of ruthlessly egocentric achievement.

18 We may, suddenly, come to the conclusion, that we have gone into the wrong direction, and, we feel a large gap between, where we are, and, where we ought to be. We become depressed; we feel useless, and, we experience a great need to confess to our environment, how wrong our goal-patterns have been. Now, we may become sensitive again to the religious ideals of human existence. We may become sensitive to the beauty of being redeemed from our errors by a divine love, or a divine way of salvation, and the attitude of open-hearted kindness towards others overwhelms us and becomes the ultimate meaning of our existence.

19 In this emotional re-adjustment to the finality of our existence, we sometimes tend to forget, (overcome with the remorse over our wasted years), that we can only recognise the limitations of biologically oriented goal-patterns, because we have pursued them, successfully, for many years. We only recognise the futilty of relentless egocentric goal-patterns, if we have had the opportunity to fulfill a majority of our biological drives. Without having sought, and found, egocentric goals and satisfactions, an altruistic attitude would be impossible.

20 We all fall into the trap of trying to teach our youngsters the experiences of wisdom. We can not teach young people our conclusions, and, we would be far better of to develop a kind understanding for the origin and nature of their egocentricity, because we have been subjected to these same passions as well.

21 Our self-esteem fluctuates, therefore, quite widely throughout our life-time, and, these fluctuations occur, because we shift our objectives from time to time. We must have a certain self-esteem, and, we have tried to make it understandable, why we need a mechanism to restore this self-esteem, from time to time, whenever we have damaged it by disappointing ourselves with our own behaviour. By the act of atonement, the gap between what we ought to be and what we are, is narrowed. When we are fully aware of this wide gap, we are most seriously disillusioned with ourselves. We are depressed, and our self-esteem is low, but, it starts to rise, as soon as we have been able to bring ourselves to the powerful act of atonement, repentance or acknowledgement of short-comings.

22 One of the most remarkable aspects of a state of full maturity, is the realisation, by people all over the world, that purely egocentric goal-patterns lead, eventually, to a bitter emptiness; a non-fulfilment, a hollow victory. Why is this, or, is this evaluation an idealistic deception? We have to emphasise, again, that the hollowness of an egocentric victory can only be appreciated, after such a victory has taken place. Unfortunately, many human beings die without having been allowed to fulfil, even, their most basic existential requirements. For these unfortunate people, who die stunted in their development by malnutrition, oppression and disease, the development of the normal ego-drive is dull and stunted as well.

23 If people are finally able to secure, after a long struggle, an adequate set of circumstances for normal growth and a full development of their potentials, we see a vigorous ego-drive, which may display strong sentiments of aggression and resentment towards those, who were responsible for their misery and poverty, while they are able to identify, at least, to some extent, with the oppressed and the poor throughout the world.

24 Later, after such a social environment has learned, like countless societies before, that history is repeating iself, again and again; when such a society starts to realise, how often the same cycle of birth, growth and maturation has taken place before, the satiation of ego-drives and primary biological requirements will make these people susceptible to the philosophical quest for a universally acceptable meaning of human life. These people may go through a phase of compassion, mutual affection and kindness, even towards those who are outside the cultural boundaries of their origins, before the inexorable processes of affluence, decay and corruption set-in, once again.

25 It would be foolish to try to teach the hungry and depraved attitudes of kindness and compassion towards those who have oppressed them for so long. In their oppression, they have learned interdependence and kindness within their culture and society very well, but, we can not expect, that they will develop, quickly, a philosophical broadness of mind towards those people and groups of people who contributed to their oppression and misery.

26 Pride in social growth, the unfolding of talents, together with a state of vigorous health for those who recently triumphed over poverty, disease and malnutrition, is similar to the proud success of the under-privileged youngster, who finds, with determination and pluck, a place in the society he has just entered. Do not expect a doubting, questioning and philosophising outlook in those, whose vigour is far greater than the elan vital of the established members.

27 Yet, we know, that these "nouveau arrivees" will, eventually, become established members, too, just as we were new-comers, not so long ago. Then, the process for a deeper search for the meaning of life will repeat itself. This is the reason, why it is fair to state, that, eventually, a point will be reached by every healthy individual or social environment, just past the stage of full maturity, when the experiences of human awareness, as well as the questions of life and death, will begin to find their answers beyond the primary drives and satisfactions of a biological heritage.

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Summary

1. The three forms of pride; roots, personal achievements and judgements.
Mechanisms of prejudice.
Relationships between pride and prejudice, and the social acceptability of a judgement.

2. An analysis of the attitudes of pride and prejudice.
Pride and sacred belief structures.
Reasons for the vagueness of many ideas and concepts.
The need for intellectual precision.
Pride, prejudice and social mechanisms in the establishment of the hierarchical structure.
Differences between success and achievement.
The role of confidence.
The pride of roots and origins; relationships with strangers.
The weapon of pride and the search for triumph.
Quiet confidence and personal achievement; trust.

3. Pride and dignity.
Meaning of life; mental depression.
The dualism of good and evil; the role of leadership.
Religious concepts about an existence after dealth.
Western assumptions about its role as guardians of the Christian Faith.
The Western philosophy of competitiveness and free-enterprise.
Our knowledge of the Will of God.

4. Difficulties with Christian ethics.
The inversion of the biological heritage.
Pride in suffering for Christ.
The apparent inversion of the attitude of pride.
The value of atonement.

5. The destructiveness of the loss of self-esteem.
The problem of silent contempt.
Another look at the religious community.
The two forms of Christianity.
Reviewing the meaning of self-esteem.
Shifting goal-patterns and the meaning of life.
Limitations of egocentric attitudes.
The teaching of wisdom.
The act of atonement.
The basic requirements of wisdom.
The life-cycle of individuals and societies.

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